Every time I go back to my home town of Wolverhampton, I look
forward to seeing the school girls. These are friends whom I have known since
the age of 11, and together we lived through pre-ghd hairstyles, dreadful boyfriends, and several years of PE
in ‘navy pants.’
Nowadays it seems as natural to discuss the bank’s base rate as it does the best place to get your foundation. Anyway, you know you’re getting on when
one of you says:
“Look at that girl without a coat.
For the
record she also didn’t seem to be sporting much of a skirt.
Does she not realise it’s November?
Longing
look at bare arms.
Remember when we didn't wear coats?”
Much hilarity was enjoyed. In fact, we almost certainly
ruined the Friday night dinner of several couples with our raucous behaviour.
I thought I’d share my highlights.
On
Parking.
Friend 1: “You know I’m a bit worried about my car.”
Friend 2: “Why’s that?”
Friend 1: “Well I parked it somewhere that said ‘clamping in
operation.’"
Friend 2: “why did you do that?”
Friend 1: “ well I was driving to my work’s car park, but then
someone else’s work car park was nearer, so I just dumped it there.”
Friend 2: “Right.”
Friend 1: “Yes and the sign said clamping was in operation – but
what kind of clamper works on a Friday night? It’ll be fine.”
Friend 2: “This sounds worryingly like the time you parked in the
bay reserved for charging an electric car in Birmingham.”
Friend 1: Laughs “Oh god”
Friend 2: “Yes you had 2 lovely tickets for that one.”
Friend 1: “You know I remember that I couldn’t believe my luck
getting such a good parking spot. I’d been driving for ages and it was so convenient.”
Friend 2: “Wasn’t there a sign?”
Friend 2: “Turns out yes. And a big, well, flashing plug. I
thought how handy it was to have an emergency i-phone charger in the carpark.”
I am pleased to report that the evening passed without a clamping
or ticketing incident.
On being
born in the 1990s.
Friend 1: “My ex has got a new girlfriend.”
Friend 2: “Oh no, I’m sorry love.”
Friend 1: “No, it’s fine. Well, it’s not fine, but I wrote a poem
about it today.”
Friend 2: “A poem?”
Friend 1: “Yes.”
Friend 2: “Dare I ask, what about?”
Friend 2: “You’re stalking her on twitter?”
Friend 1: “Not stalking no. Researching.”
Friend 2: “Oh that’s alright then.”
Friend 1: “I know. Anyway. Turns out, she’s young.”
Friend 2: “Uhuh.”
Friend 1: “Yes, so the title is ‘Born in the 90s.”
Friend 2: “Have you ever thought you might have missed your
calling as a feminist beat poet?”
Friend 1: “Now you mention it….”
So if you were in Made in Thai in Wolverhampton on Friday night, that was what we were all laughing at.
And if you weren't, you can read about what happened on one of our
previous meet ups here.
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