Downton
has finished. I got a telegram with the news and I’m heartbroken. I’m not
entirely sure what I will do on a Sunday evening now. Songs of Praise just
doesn’t cut it.
Let’s
face it, Downton Abbey is brilliant because it looks like a costume drama but behaves like a
soap. The characters change personality
every few minutes, and the plot has moments of absolutely lunacy; but as it’s
about posh people and is loosely based on historical events, we conclude
that it must be acceptable to watch.
And acceptable it was. The
nation was hooked.
Who amongst us will forget
Matthew’s tingle? We didn’t see that
coming did we? That miraculous leap when paralysed Matthew jumped from his
wheelchair to rescue Lavinia from a falling tea-tray.
Lavinia sadly lost out in the
public vote and died. Too obvious? Apparently not. Thank god for Spanish flu as
a useful device for bumping off characters.
"It's a strange disease with
sudden savage changes," said the doctor, as Lavinia began to look
distinctly peaky.
Mr Molesley however did not
have Spanish Flu. No, turns out he was just pissed.
And who was the mystery
mummy – the one who’d survived the sinking of the Titanic, woken up with a
Canadian accent and remembered that he was the long lost heir of the Abbey?
Even the Eastender’s writers couldn’t have dreamt that one up.
Luckily for us all, Lord Grantham remembered just in time that he was not a lothario,
and will be sticking to discussing port and dinner jackets rather than groping
the maids.
Sir Richard will be starring
in panto this Christmas as the wicked witch of the west.
And Edith, who used to be a
bit evil, is now throwing concerned looks left right and centre.
But of course Mary and
Matthew can never be together; not least because of Matthew’s over-reliance on
white-face paint. “We're cursed, you and I, and there's nothing to be done
about it," Matthew told Lady Mary.
I would guess that there's
at least another series to be ‘done about’ exactly that.
We certainly hope so,
because how would we cope without it? I’m not sure. But I won’t be defeatist.
After all, it’s so middle class.
You forgot to mention that Matthew will shortly be appearing in Breaking Dawn, coming to a cinema near you. Can a man wear that much eyeshadow under his eyes and not be Marilyn Manson?
ReplyDeleteIndeed Charity Girl. Twilight is so last year.
ReplyDelete